The Good Stuff

"Amantes ut apes vitam mellitam exigunt"
Translation - "Lovers, like bees, make life as sweet as honey."
    Latin inscription found in the House of the Lovers, Pompeii

Well, rather than have a quiet life (heaven forbid!) I decided to pack all the really strenuous stuff into a few years so I could get it all over with. The first big change was meeting Jackie, the wonderful woman who is now my wife. The short version is that we met, fell in love, and got a house together. There is a longer, much messier version, but you're not cleared for that. Jackie is wonderful. Smart, gorgeous, vibrant and sensitive, she is the missing piece of myself I spent all those years searching for. I'd done a lot of growing up over the last few years, and though we had a dozen friends n common, it seemed that Jackie and I had held off meeting each other until we were ready. I found myself doing things like getting a pension and worrying about interest rates (it happens). Thankfully I also discovered that being responsible doesn't mean you have to grow up, it just means you have less money to spend on toys.

The next big change to occur was in my job. For a number of years I'd pretty much idled along as a computer operator on the mainframe at Coventry City Council. Watching Jackie in her career made me realise that I could do more, so I applied for a job as Information Officer. The successful applicant would find themselves heading the Administration Team for the department and coordinating the flow of management information, none of which I had any experience in. I obviously caught them at a bad moment for, in a severe lapse of judgement, they decided to give me the job. I found myself in a new role, with a desk and everything! Life was fun, if stressful. Three members of my new team deeply resented the fact that I had gotten the position, and actively tried to sabotage me. Jackie helped me stay together, but it was a rough ride. Eventually I managed to lose the trouble-makers and assemble the team I wanted. My team are the only thing I really miss about my job, as they were the finest bunch of people I have ever worked with (Scott, Nanette, Beryl, Gina, Simone - thanks). Without their loyalty and support, I wouldn't have made half the impression I did. We spent two years fighting fires, pulling miracles out of top hats and doing the impossible by lunch-time. It was great, but it wasn't what I wanted to do.

Jackie and I finally got married on September 23, 1995. Quite possibly the happiest day of my life. Both the wedding and the reception were held at the Coombe Abbey Hotel, outside Coventry, and due to a recent change in UK law we were among the first people to have our wedding there. The hotel is fantastic and is actually a stately home built on the ruins of a Cistercian abbey. We started off late and got later. I got cornered by a Jehovah's witness on the way back from an emergency shopping trip (the poor guy came very close to meeting Jehovah somewhat earlier than he had in mind), and made it back to the house to discover organised pandemonium. My best man (Mike Strefford) and Jackie's maid of honour (Jacqui Archer) were incredible. Jackie and I were volatile at the best of times (we're both Scorpio's), but they worked wonders and kept everything calm. We got to the hotel forty-five minutes late (much to the displeasure of the registrar), and Jackie and I had to rush upstairs and get changed. It may be bad luck to see the bride before the wedding, but someone had to zip her up. She was breathtaking. From that point on, it was perfect. The ceremony was held in a medieval stable house attached to the old abbey, and we asked Mike and Jacqui to read a poem each that Jackie and I had selected. Jackie cried when we made our vows, and I was rewarded by the sight of all my mates spontaneously "getting something in their eyes."

Afterwards, it felt like the day couldn't be any better. The weather had been rotten all week, but on our day it was beautifully clear and sunny. The reception went smoothly and the food and drink were excellent; the staff of the hotel were working very hard indeed. Mike decided that tact was the better part of valour today and wisely avoided bringing up my sordid past, a sensible move as he later asked me to return the favour and be his best man (which scarily enough went rather well). We got some lovely gifts (what can you say about friends who buy you a ceramic skull and a phaser as wedding presents?). I managed to electrocute myself on our wedding night (Twice. Don't ask), and then we flew off to Italy for our honeymoon, where they were having torrential rain, flooding and landslides. It was perfect.

Well, life has a way of moving on, and in the summer of 1997 it did just that, big time. Jackie was headhunted by an American company who were keen to give Jackie the chance to join them, and flew us out to Boston for an interview. The opportunity to get involved with this new company and their amazing product was too much to pass up, and we leapt at the chance. So here we are, living in the USA. Jackie now supports both of us (her idea!) and I am now free to experiment with my writing and find out if I really have what it takes to become a professional author. So far, it's looking pretty good.

Looking back at what I've written here, it seems as if there's been a lot of bad stuff. It didn't always feel like it at the time. I made some good friends, had some good times, and did a lot of growing. And that's what life is all about; growth. If I had the chance, I probably wouldn't change anything. Everything that happened taught me a lesson, even if I got hurt learning it. Sometimes, growth hurts.

Right now, I'm the happiest I've ever been.

After all that, I don't have many pearls of wisdom for you. Just be happy, respect yourself and others, live for today and if you get a chance at true love, grab it with both hands and don't ever let go.

 

Life is good.

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